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Letters for the week of April 24

Letters, April 10

I'd like to respond to the comment made by Jill W. on the April 17 Letters page. She goes on and on (zzzzz) about complete nonsense unrelated to the smoking ban, meanwhile completely missing the point of the smoking ban. Nonsmokers do not care how often smokers partake in their nasty habit — we just care where. Smoke all you want in a place where I don't have to inhale the filth. I should be able to sit in a bar or a restaurant and not breathe in secondhand smoke and leave with clothes and hair that smell like an ashtray. I couldn't care less if all the smokers smoke themselves to death; I just care when their choices affect me. Kansas City has finally caught up with the rest of the world. Other cities and states have had bans in place for years. It's embarrassing that it took us this long.

Oh, yeah, Jill, you forgot to add one more category of individuals to your list: selfish people who are unable to see how their actions affect others and who are also so self-absorbed that they cannot realize any perspective different from their own.

Marci Michnick, Roeland Park

Martin: "A Hand Rocks the Cradle," April 10

Diagnosis of a loved one with a condition or disease can inspire family members to lead efforts for further research and/or to improve the lives of those enduring difficult challenges. Rep. Jeff Grisamore and his wife experienced the birth of a child with a disability and her death. Their heartfelt decision of organ donation is a continuing contribution for medical research. Bringing awareness of the importance of organ donation is to be commended. Those who critique the grief of parents having lost a child are presumptuous and unkind.

Grisamore's intention to work on behalf of all disabled people might sometimes be overshadowed by those who differ on how best to achieve common goals. Sherri Tucker's comment, that she was put off by the frequency with which Grisamore talks about Rebekah and the mention of her name at a rally for Disability Rights Day in Jefferson City, is petty. Hundreds of disabled persons remain on waiting lists for day programs, respite care, transportation, etc. These people and their families are the ones entitled to feel put off.

Legislators are known to support agendas of many organizations — pro-life groups, pro-choice groups, AARP, the NEA and chambers of commerce. The developmentally disabled community is not represented by wealthy, influential organizations. It is represented by families, care givers, advocates, self advocates and Rep. Grisamore. Seeking support for his re-election is warranted. Some people can find fault no matter how the request is made.

A more worthy public service career cannot be found when it comes to representing our most vulnerable citizens: the chosen career of Rep. Jeff Grisamore.

Judy Green, Lee's Summit

As a parent of three children with disabilities, I feel so blessed to have Rep. Jeff Grisamore representing the 47th District. Over the years, I have developed relationships with many previous legislators. While they have all been willing to listen to my concerns as a parent of a child with disabilities, none have tried to do as much as Grisamore has during his time in Jefferson City. It is clear to me that having Rebekah in his life has given him the drive and passion for people with disabilities. Until you have experienced the life of raising a child with a disability, you cannot possibly imagine the physical, emotional and financial stress it causes a family. Grisamore gets it and is willing to advocate for those who cannot advocate for themselves.

Tracy Damario, Lee's Summit

In a very dark hour of my life, after my newborn died at KU Medical Center and after my obstetrician abandoned me, having led the pregnancy to severely overdue at 44 weeks, and didn't even offer me a word of condolences on the death of my infant, it was Jeff Grisamore who called with his support, sharing his personal tragedy with me. In my complete desolation, he was able to reach my family with his kindness and empathy. Mr. Grisamore, I will be forever grateful to you for your sincere words at that horrible hour. I will never forget your help.

No one can understand the nature of grief that envelops you after losing a child. You just want to talk about him constantly. I think about my baby Nikolai every day.

Maria Gilliland, Kansas City, Missouri Missouri State Rep. Jeff Grisamore responds:

Dear David: ... I would offer a few observations in response to your article. First, let’s remember the context. You received a forward of an e-mail that I sent to four trusted allies in the disabilities community whom I work with for the disabled. They wanted to forward out a letter to their family and friends in the disabilities community. Someone who received that e-mail obviously forwarded to The Pitch....

You quoted my letter as saying, “Fighting for individuals with disabilities — especially children — and their families is my highest priority. This passion is driven by our seventh child, Rebekah, who died November 26, 2002 from complications of Prader-Willi syndrome at 11 months and 18 days.

I, and many in the disabilities community, do not at all see my above quote as “connecting my request for money to the death of my daughter” as your headlines imply....

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